u.s. birth rate makes us look like a puppy mill

more babies were born in the u.s. in 2007 than any other year, ever, making the baby boom seem like nothing but a mild swelling (no pun intended). another item of note: 40% of those babies - heading speedily for half of them, for those of us that are math-challenged - were born out of wedlock.

why? and is this what we want? (we're just asking.)

if big pharma wants it, it's probably bad

big pharma is attempting to leverage recent grumbles about the safety of the food supply into a full-scale demolition of the fda.

look, we won't kid you: the fda sucks. big pharma all but owns it, and the recent spate of back-stepping tv ads and recalled drugs are enough to show that the handwriting is definitely on the wall. so how can it be a good thing if there is less oversight and a rush to get unproven drugs to market even faster (that is, before the lawyers can get them banned because they caused little timmy's head to become a puffball mushroom)?

does the fda need to be rebuilt? absolutely. but since when is it a good idea to let the fox design the henhouse?

no more tears, but maybe cancer

we've posted hundreds of clips about various products that the manufacturers and the government institutions that they bought & paid for have said were safe - even good for us - only to fiund later that they caused genetic mutations, spontaneous combustion, and uncontrollable flatulence, but this one has got to be the blue ribbon:

most of the kids' bath products tested were found to contain known carcinogens.

holy crap, people - what's wrong with a system that allows these scum to give our kids cancer and get away with it?

why the pope is no longer relevant

first, a disclaimer: i'm not a big fan of organized religion. in fact, i'm convinced that it's holding us back culturally, socially, and intellectually more than any other single factor, and let's not forget the holy wars that have had many of us at each other's throats for centuries. i consider the religious establishment - any religious establishment - to be on a par with blood-sucking leeches. they have their hands in our pockets and produce nothing that is on par with what they take. is it any wonder that more of us than ever before now say that we have no religion?

that being said, can you believe that the latest pope still says not to use condoms - even in africa, and even to prevent the spread of aids?

folks, if that didn't spell out the fact that the church is willfully out of touch with reality (and you & me), nothing will. no matter how cool the pope's hat is.

if you think medical regulation is lax...

... and owned entiurely by the companies whose products are being regulated, here's your proof: govt investigators looking into the review process recently made up a fake medical product and got it approved for human testing.

(we'd say more, but we've got to get our elastic erection extender to market.)

michelle trachtenberg

anyone seen michelle trachtenberg lately?

quit yer bitchin' #40

we all know this was dick cheney's plan, but the tide has temporarily turned. bankers are now on the menu.

(if you like this idea, check out the song missionary.)

avril lavigne

dear avril: you are not pink. hell, even pink's not pink, so quit trying to be.

and no matter what carefully constructed, audience-attracting persona your record company comes up with for you to wear, never forget that you originally got into the biz as a country singer - a fact that you might not want your fans to know.

quit yer bitchin' 39

the irony involved here is simply breathtaking. i mean, every guy in the western hemisphere knows that a rump rider tattoo automatically equals one-night-stand-trash. it's fuck-me advertising, plain and simple, because no woman with any real respect for herself thinks that a guy needs anything but her to look at from this particular angle.

as tina turner once sang, 'what's love got to do with it?' absolutely nothing.

so what comes next for girls whose self-respect continues to fall faster than the dow? ass comics? led-implant nipple piercings? hell, why not invest in a little e-ink action and get a whole animated cartoon inscribed in place of your shorn pubes? because nothing else about you is interesting, and guys that aren't interested in anything else are so worthwhile.

quit yer bitchin' 38

likewise this fellow. because - if nothing else (ha! as if) - he's got too much time on his hands. and no idea what to do with it.

(the worst part? he says it tickles. that is just way too much information. i mean, he doesn't even have puffies.)

quit yer bitchin' 37

we're betting it never happens. not even if she drinks herself into a coma and out the other side.

i mean, would you?

review: watchmen

first, a disclaimer: we read and enormously admired watchmen when it originally came out in print. no doubt by now you've read a bit of its history and the hows and whys of what it changed in the comic - now graphic novel - world, paving the way for the current batman incarnation, Y: the last man, and on and on. but does the movie do it justice?

yes and no.

as a literal translation, the film hits most of the beats, but lacks the feeling that the ink & paper version engendered. this despite a good cast (and a fantastic bit of work by jackie earle haley as rorschach).

frankly, i think it's a question of style. zack snyder has a very definite shooting style. his fast cuts and textures tend to be distractions from the fact that his work lacks genuine emotion, even when presenting material as horrific and profound as some segments of watchmen are.

perhaps it's simply a matter of age. but the emotionless motion of modern film seems to be a growing trend: wooden acting over wooden words, with little or no genuine feeling anywhere. or are we just jaded?

it's competent, but not compelling. when all's said and done, at least he managed to get the 'unfilmable film' on celluloid, when so many others (including terry gilliam, whose version we would have liked to see) failed.

final verdict: good, but not great.

we're back

our apologies, sports fans - a rather serious physical injury forced our time away to run a bit longer than expected. luckily, physical therapy has commenced and the prognosis is good.

did you miss us? manage to catch the latest (as well as the retro) musical musings at mog.com/dda?

good on ya. now on to what's been on our mind of late.