we include courtney love because - despite being quite intelligent and talented - in matters involving real life, she is a total space cadet.
and then there's charlize theron, a south african import that drops trou in virtually every film in which she appears, despite top-line acting chops.
as long as we're on a sci-fi kick, how about uk-born marina sirtis? in case you've forgotten, she played counselor troi on star trek, who wandered around the set saying things like, 'captain, i sense that my character is underdeveloped, and nothing but a prototype for cold, missile-titted disciplinarians that will go on to have careers that aren't limited to fan conventions in boise'.
speaking of doctor who, billie piper, who played rose tyler during the first 2 series of the current reincarnation, is a fabulous actress. plus she's english, which we admit we've always had a thing for. 
we don't do heroes* but we're fascinated by the endless tide of young, dumb actresses that allow themselves to be photographed doing things that their publicists will later quit over.
it is our considered opinion that there can never be enough suggestive underwear in the world. or clever, snotty t-shirts that allow you to express what you think but would probably never say. if you agree, have we got a site for you...
i painted this mermaid almost 20 years ago. a friend suggested that i open a gallery. why not?
now this is attractive. reminds us of wedding crashers. it would also probably make a helluva country song:
the choice of fixtures at the archdiocese are probably your first clue regarding whether or not your children will be safe there.
we're pretty sure that they have some kind of medication for that now.
our friends in the pr business will find this especially poignant.
'i wonder if i'm getting too old for comic book conventions. ha! what was i thinkin'? as if that could ever happen!'
'um, hi boss. hey, you remember when you told me that the cars weren't balanced right on the barge, and i said that they were? yeah? well, turns out you were right.'
if you've been wondering how the credit crisis happened, how it ties in with the failure of major corporations, housing, and the savings & loan shenanigans of the 80's, this video is a good place to start.
if you were a tiny little school district in texas, without gangs or much in the way of violent crime, and you read about shootings at huge schools like virginia tech, we're betting that your response wouldn't be to arm your teachers.
first, our apologies for that headline. the staff was probably drunk at the time (they usually are), and those responsible have been sacked.
most towns don't test their drinking water for anywhere near all of the contaminants that currently appear, but one of the toxins that most do test for - arsenic - appears to be linked with the growing epidemic of type 2 diabetes.
the clip says that this is dubya's doing, but we all know by now that it's tricky dickless, don't we?
career network steals job listings from craigslist (on which they also frequently advertize jobs) & other employment sites, pretends that the jobs are listed through them or one of their dozens of link sites, and sends them via email to unsuspecting resume posters as if cn were the ones doing the hiring. if you apply, they sock you with text messaging charges, collect your cell phone info, throw up credit card offers, college pitches, and collect contact information re: your references - whom they also hit up.
loyalty to the country always. loyalty to the government when it deserves it.
don't you find it epically satisfying when a holier-than-thou political whore reveals themselves as the total shit that you always knew they were? like when sen. john edwards said that - not only did he cheat on his cancer-stricken wife - but the affair began when she was in remission.
in 1960, the average american male weighed 160 pounds. as of lunch today, this has swollen to 240 pounds and a side of bacon. for the past decade, experts have puzzled over what caused this sudden, rampant porkage (other than 70 years of food additives, western affluence, supersizing, and ads promoting frosted flakes as an afternoon snack). now, in an exclusive elsewhen report, the real reason is finally revealed:
'yeah, we planned the whole thing,' admitted lactos, the high overlord of meat planet earth. 'see, earth is right off the hyperspace bypass between rigel & vermillion. it made perfect sense to turn it into a feeder farm for extraterrestrial travelers on the go. you'll be eating each other in another 30 years or so, anyway. we just beat you to the punch.'
dark knight is on its way to $500 million at the box office, so we thought we'd run this pic of michelle pfeiffer - catwoman in another director's vision of batman (which we like, too, in the same way that we like 9 kinds of pie & consider them all to be our very favorite).
to goose our traffic & seo, this pic of ms. pfeiffer was taken about the same time as this pic of heather locklear.
ms. locklear, you may recall, was popular at around the same time as porn star ginger lynn allen, whom we include here in a recent photo simply because we like you.
another equally apt caption for this might be 'how to know when it's time to get a new job'.
you know that the traditional media - new media war is heating up when the l.a. times brags about their record 127 million page views in july and gawker laughs at them.
the white supremacist nutjobs (as opposed to all of the other colorful nutjobs that dot our national landscape) appear to be in favor of barak obama winning the presidency. they seem to think that it will lead to an awakening and revolution by whites against minorities.
like many of you, we grew up on tuna fish casserole. to this day, we maintain that nothing offered by even the great metropolitan grille comes close to this sublime bit of hot dish. and tuna sushi.... mmmmm, tuna....
